Dead Donut Pushers

Sometimes the scammers get confused and forget who they have written. I remember this guy because of the name. Peter Tan is too close to Peter Pan to fail to generate a mnemonic link. Last time I was more subtle in my reply. I decided to have some fun with him this time.

The Approach:

My name is Mr. Peter Tan, I trained and work as an external auditor for the Maybank Malaysia. A late investor who bears the same last name with you has left (USD 10M) with Our Bank for the past Eight years and no next of kin has come forward all these years. I seek your permission to present you as the next of kin to this inheritance of my late investor. Please get back to me on my private EMAIL :( officeoftan1@gmail.com) for details if you are interested.Best Regards.

Peter Tan

My Response:

Peter,I wrote you last week and have heard nothing from you. This is the same letter you sent me then? Are you trying to scam me? I certainly hope not because I felt you and I had a special connection. Did you get my photo? I usually don't send the one of myself in a mankini out right away, but you caught me in a very playful moment. I suppose the next question is: When will I receive your photo? Am I pushing to hard? Mother says I drive people away by being too needy. I say mother and her 10 cats should thank god every night that I don't kill them all in their sleep. Does that bother you? Mother having 10 cats I mean. It bothers me, but not as much as when she had 11, but I took care of that. I mean WHO HAS 11 CATS PETER? That's just crazy. We all know that cats should come in 10's. It's like Donuts come in dozens (sometimes they try to slip an extra in there if you aren't careful... I could point you to the shallow graves of more than a few donut pushers who made that mistake. I was thinking that perhaps I should send you another photo in case you lost the last one, but I feel as if I'm the only one giving in this relationship and that's a recipe for a murder/suicide don't you think? I have an address below that you can write me at and we can share secrets and exchange gifts. I can't wait to see what you send me as my first gift. I think I'm going to send you a pink bodysuit... what size do you wear? Do you already have one? I have 6 of course.

Jimmy Spudman Motes

Cell 743

W. McDermott

Allen, Texas 75013